


dream on, until tomorrow

by marvelleous



Series: saying goodbye is the hardest thing to do [3]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, You get the drill by now
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-13
Updated: 2017-02-13
Packaged: 2018-09-24 02:48:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9696362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marvelleous/pseuds/marvelleous
Summary: Gaps in their memory.Flashes of another time, another life.Phil and Melinda, and their time together inside the framework.sequel to waking up is the hardest goodbye, and goodbye, my hopeless dream





	

When Melinda wakes up in the morning, the sun is already lighting up the room through the sheer curtains. She almost sits up in a panic, but then remembers that it is Sunday, so they are in no rush to get ready for the day. Peggy doesn’t have school, and she doesn’t have anything planned for today, and Phil…

 

Phil is still asleep beside her, one arm flung over his head, his chest rising and falling with even breaths. She can scarcely believe that they are here, that they have this life together, after all the things they had been through. Smiling, she reaches over and runs a fingertip across the bridge of his nose, covering her mouth with her other hand to stop the laugh from escaping when he squirms at her touch. 

 

She doesn’t need to check the clock on his bedside table to know that it is still early, early enough that Peggy is still in bed and likely will not be up and wanting breakfast for at least another hour. She can go and stretch, maybe do some Tai Chi, go and water the new flowers Phil had planted in their backyard and then brew herself a mug of hot tea and curl up on the couch with a good book. 

 

She pulls back the covers, stretching her arms over her head and swings one leg over the edge of the bed, ready to start the day, when she feels Phil begin moving behind her. She can tell he’s slowing his movements to be as quiet as possible, but the mattress behind her dips slightly as he shifts, and she smiles again again when she feels his hand on her hip, fingers trailing beneath the hem of her tank top, teasing the bare skin with a gentle brush. She leans back into his chest, feeling the warmth against her back and exhales, sinking into his embrace. 

 

“Good morning,” he says softly, brushing her hair over one shoulder and pressing a kiss just behind the shell of her ear, before trailing his lips down her neck and playfully nipping at her shoulder. 

 

“It is now.”

 

Melinda turns and shuffles back onto the bed, looping both arms around Phil’s neck, resting their foreheads together, the tips of their noses just barely touching. His eyes are so blue, and though she would never say it out loud, she could be happy just staring into them for the rest of her days. Still, she allows her eyelids to flutter close when he presses a kiss to her lips, his hands slowing moving up her back and into her hair. Phil had some sort of fascination with her hair which she quite frankly didn’t understand, but appreciated nonetheless. 

 

There wasn’t a kiss they had shared where his hands hadn’t wound up buried in her curls, tugging at them when he wanted her to tilt her head back so he would have access to her neck. Or how he would take every opportunity possible to join her in the shower, brushing away her hands when she went to wash her hair, massaging in the shampoo himself, fingers gentle as they untangled the knots. Though she suspected his eagerness to share the bathroom with her had less to do with actually making sure her hair was clean and more to do with the activities that would often follow. 

 

Not that she didn’t encourage him in that regard. 

 

A lingering kiss to the edge of his jaw, fingers stroking the back of his neck. A suggestive smile before she left the room. And when she was feeling particularly in the mood, she would lean over, and give him a good glimpse down her shirt. 

 

Sometimes, they didn’t even make it back to their room. 

 

It was a wonder they hadn’t yet scarred their daughter for life. 

 

“What are you thinking about?” he asks her as he ends their kiss, lying back down in bed and pulling her with him, his arm tightening around her waist as she wriggled closer. She doesn’t answer him with words, instead snaking her arms down to the hem of his shirt and making to pull it off. 

 

They don’t leave the bed until there’s a soft knock at their door much later on, and Peggy’s high pitched voice asks if they’re awake yet. Phil laughs and shakes his head and Melinda throws a pillow at his face, rolling her eyes at his antics before she slips out of bed to let their daughter in. 

 

* * *

 

They have a different routine during the week. 

 

Melinda is up as the sun rises, and often finds that Phil has been watching her sleep for who knows how long. She’ll give him a quick kiss, before slipping out of bed and changing into her workout clothes and joggers before heading out for a quick run through their neighbourhood. It’s early enough that no one is up and about yet, and she doesn’t have to stop and make small talk with the nosy housewives. 

 

Phil is always preparing breakfast when she gets back and begins her Tai Chi, and she performs her movements to the sound of his voice, just listening to all his little ramblings about the things he saw or did in the very short amount of time they spend apart. Neither of them work; they’re retired, it’s classified, is what Phil tells anyone who asks, but truth be told, she can’t, and doesn’t want to remember what they had before this. 

 

She drops Peggy off at school in the morning, and he picks her up in the afternoon, and aside from those brief moments apart, they spend every waking moment together. 

 

She doesn’t think she could ever get sick of it. 

 

* * *

 

Peggy is six when she asks them for something they just can’t refuse her. 

 

They’re curled up on the couch in the sitting room, a cartoon playing in the background, and Peggy is watching with rapt attention, eyes never leaving the screen. Melinda is leaning against Phil; he has one arm wrapped around her shoulder and is idly twirling a strand of her hair around his finger. They’re speaking in hushed tones, well, Phil is speaking; about his conversation with the little old lady who lived at the end of their road earlier that day, and Melinda is just nodding against him, not particularly interested but loving the sound of his voice. 

 

When the show ends just before Peggy’s bedtime, they go to switch the television off and prepare to take her back to her room, but she clambers up onto Phil’s lap with a big smile and an even bigger question. 

 

“Mommy, Daddy. Can I please have a baby brother or sister?”

 

Phil turns to Melinda to gage her reaction, and finds her smiling at him, and that’s all the confirmation he needs. 

 

“Of course, Princess.”

 

* * *

 

Nothing changes for a while, and then it does. 

 

Phil wakes up one morning and finds Melinda on the bathroom floor, just hugging the toilet, and she gives him a look, and he knows. 

 

He doesn’t think he’s been this excited in his entire life. He tries to think back to when they found out about Peggy and the day she was born, but the memories are blurry, and he passes it off as being a nervous first time father and just forgetting the little details. 

 

Their routine changes now. Melinda still does her Tai Chi, but now it’s after breakfast and after Phil has dropped Peggy off at school. They spend their days together curled up in bed - she rests her head on his chest while he reads to her, one hand flipping through the pages of the stories they share and the other resting on her belly, over their unborn son or daughter. 

 

Phil works tirelessly converting their spare room into a nursery, and they bicker for hours about what colour he should paint the walls. Peggy suggests red, white and blue, and Phil gives her one of his pleading looks, but she rolls her eyes and stands her ground. Peggy had always been a daddy’s girl, hadn’t she?

 

* * *

 

The look on Phil’s face the day they find out they’re having another girl is one she will treasure forever. The pale yellow of the nursery is changed to mint green, and they fill the room with furniture; a bassinet, matching cupboards and drawers and all the things their newest daughter will ever need. 

 

Peggy crawls into their bed at night to talk to the baby, and ends up falling asleep curled around Melinda’s belly. After Phil carries her back to her room and tucks her in, he turns and does the same thing, chattering on about how excited he is to meet her, how they’ve always wanted this, and Melinda thinks that yes, they have always wanted this. 

 

She knows that they have. 

 

* * *

 

Phil cries when the baby is born. 

 

Melinda sheds a tear, but quickly brushes it away, and reaches for her daughter with a watery smile. 

 

She is perfect; ten little fingers, ten little toes, a button nose and large brown eyes that already peer into the world with such curiosity. 

 

After she is all swaddled up in a pink blanket, Phil and Peggy join Melinda on the bed, Peggy gazing at her sister with what can only be described as the utmost affection. 

 

“What’s the baby’s name Mommy?” she whispers, because the baby is sleeping, and she doesn’t want to wake her up. Melinda is running a finger over her newborn’s chubby cheek, marvelling at how alike she and Peggy looked, but not quite being able to remember how exactly Peggy was like as a baby, and she freezes at the words. 

 

She and Phil had discussed baby names for days on end, writing out lists and crossing names off and consulting various books Phil had managed to procure. They had never managed to settle on a name, because nothing had felt right. 

 

He had openly pondered about how they had managed to pick a name for Peggy so easily if it took them this long to decide now. She had stilled, giving him a forced smile, because she couldn’t answer him. 

 

They had conveniently forgotten about it by the next morning.

 

* * *

 

 

They’re home and Peggy’s asleep when they finally have the conversation. The baby is asleep in Melinda’s arms, and she and Phil are sitting together in silence. His hand is rubbing her back, trying to soothe away the fears, but they both know that there’s something they’ve been missing. 

 

Gaps in their memory. 

 

Flashes of another time, another life. 

 

“Something’s wrong, Phil,” she says to him, staring down at their daughter. They were supposed to be happy. But all she knows right now is confusion and terror, and she knows Phil feels the same way. 

 

“I know,” he tells her, shaking his head softly. 

 

The baby begins to stir, and he helps her remove the swaddling blanket, gently pulling away and leaving the squirming infant in only a onesie that they had absentmindedly dressed her in this morning. It’s white with a flower over the chest, and as Melinda gently soothes her daughter, her hands freeze, hovering over it. 

 

The…

 

The daisy. 

 

_ Daisy. _

 

“Daisy,” Phil whispers as she slowly turns her head to look at him. 

 

“Daisy,” she says back, and then it all comes back to her. 

 

Their other lives, a distant dream, a forgotten memory. 

 

And those they’d left behind. 

 

She and Phil don’t need to communicate their thoughts to one another - they’re so in tune now. She can tell from one gaze what he’s thinking, and the way he holds her shows her that he knows what is running through her mind. 

 

It’s time to say goodbye. 

 

* * *

 

They allow themselves one more day. 

 

They carry on through their routine and pretend that nothing has changed. 

 

That evening they let Peggy sleep in their bed, just watching as she drifts off in between them, curled around a pillow, her unruly curls fanned out around her. They lay the baby down beside her, and say their last tear-filled goodbyes.

 

_ “We love you Peggy.” _

 

_ “We love you Daisy.” _

 

They fall asleep, wrapped around their little family.

 

_ “I love you Melinda.” _

 

_ “I love you Phil.” _

 

* * *

 

 

When Melinda next opens her eyes, she’s in a familiar room. It’s Phil’s room back on base. She steadies her breathing and checks out her surroundings. Nothing seems to have changed, but they’ve moved another bed into the room, two doubles sandwiched together to form one large sleeping space. 

 

She feels exhausted, like she’s been to hell and back, but when she turns her head and sees Phil lying on the other side of the bed, hooked up to an IV and heart monitor, much like her, neck craned so he can watch her, she smiles. 

 

They’ve made it back. 

 

Together. 

 

“Hey.”

 

“Hey, yourself.”

 

She wonders whose idea it was to move them in here, so close, yet too far apart for her liking. 

 

“How long were we gone?” she asks him, closing her eyes and taking breath, calming herself. 

 

“Simmons said nearly a month. Our team has been protecting us.”

 

Phil’s tone is full of love as he speaks, and she feels the same way. They needed to be here, for each other. Dreams were wonderful, almost magical, but reality was different. 

The best kind of different.

 

Phil is smiling, reaching his arm out for her, but she finds she cannot do the same. She hadn’t felt the numbness in her arm before, but now she realises why she can’t feel it. 

 

Daisy. 

 

She’s asleep in a foetal position, curled up in between her and Phil, and Melinda wonders why she hadn’t noticed earlier. She had been distracted, by Phil, needing to know he was okay, needing to know he was there beside her. 

 

She slides her arm out as slowly as possible, careful not to jostle Daisy and wake her, wriggling her fingers when she succeeds, trying to return circulation to them. She stretches her arm out to Phil, all the fear and heartache gone as his fingers interlock with hers, and rests her other hand on Daisy’s shoulder, just needing to feel her, know that she was really there.

 

They were back. 

 

They were here. 

 

With  _ their _ Daisy. 

 

It wasn’t perfect, but it was real. 

 

And that’s all they truly needed. 

 


End file.
